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Posts Tagged ‘motivation’

So I am still sick.  My left ear has been filled with fluid for over a week at this point.  My facial sinuses are starting to feel some relief though.  Unfortunately, I did not make either of my anticipated runs this weekend. 

I woke up early as planned on Saturday to start the lentil soup for Easter.  I felt terrible after a rough night and grudgingly conceded that I would not be going out during the free window I had.  So I rested for a couple of hours until I got up to shower and continue cooking.  I did well cooking and handling (tolerating) all the family in my house for the day.  The meal was done perfectly at 1 PM and everyone was happy.  A bonus of the ear fluid was that I could make it clear I could not hear well.  My mother is a terrible gossip and gave up the one-sided conversation when I waasn’t answering her.  Of course, then she went and cornered my father and stepmother.  Their problem, not mine.

Saturday night, I went to bed with the good intentions of getting up to try the 3 miles on Sunday.  I again had a rough night and felt tired when I got up.  But I got ready for the day, ate breakfast, did some laundry and dishes, intending to get done what needed to get done.  Then I got real tired.  I layed down on the couch and it was over.  My husband took the kids to the store and out to lunch, I slept for 5 hours.  I took it easy getting going again after they came home.  I was pretty hungry by dinner time and felt better by reading time, 8 PM.  I really enjoy the time we spend reading together before the kids go to bed. 

I set 2 alarms last night.  One for running and one for not running.  I ended up not running.  I decided that maybe since I crashed Sunday and I actually to work Monday, I should not use up all my energy before I get there.  It just wouldn’t do to have my 4 year old and parrot run the shop if I pass out, exhausted.

Which brings me to my new concern.  I can feel that I am slowly getting better, emphasis on slowly, but when should I just do it?  Tomorrow?  I’d like to.  Again, I am going to try to get up.  I remember reading in Runner’s World that you can safely break for 5 days without detriment to your training.  I have been off and on for 3 weeks at this point, with nothing since last Sunday.  Also, we had to move furniture on Saturday to set up the tables and I was really struggling with the couch.  The overall weakness I feel is not encouraging.  What if I can’t make my goals for the race in June?  I need to reset my training again, but how far back should I go?  I can say to my mind that I have not had my mental running boost for some time and I am just being negative.

So, stay positive, you can get back up.  I think I have reached a commitment point where that first step out is the hard one.  My face doesn’t hurt today and I did not have as much crap in my lungs this morning.  I have been sounding really yummy in the morning lately.  Since I run against traffic, I don’t really need my left ear, not much comes from that direction.  And I haven’t passed out today, so I probably slept it off yesterday.  And my Facebook profile only shows 8 miles for April, I have to change that.

Some parting words of recently aquired wisdom, muffin tins are good for more than just muffins.  I froze the leftover lentil soup and then bagged up the disks this morning for pre-portioned ready-to-go soup!

Frozen Lentil Soup in muffin tins gets bagged up!

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When I run, I think.  I think about what I have to do, what I have done, and what I might be able to do.  It gives me time to sort my life and priorities.  Currently I am training for a half marathon in June.  I like to imagine myself blowing away my goal of less than 2 hours.  I find that I am more optimistic and focused in all aspects of my life when I have a strong goal I believe I can achieve.

Sunday, I made a 6 mile long run.  I last ran 6 miles in September of last year.  I fell out of running shortly thereafter due to morning craziness with the kids and a new job.  I had a rough time mentally without my outlet.  When I resumed in January, I quickly rediscovered my mojo.  As a morning runner, I love the idea of accomplishment before breakfast.  I love the feeling of success in what I start out to do.  It starts my day on a very positive note.  I may have become an endorphin junkie, as I now run 5 days a week. 

So Sunday, I felt fantastic.  I even wrote that to some friends who track their runs with me.  To get back to a milestone I had not visited in 5 months and actually run faster, I felt I could take on any challenge.  When I saw my time, I was nearly jumping for joy at outdoing myself.  I can do anything!  I felt strong and cute.  (Since cutting my hair, I had to go twin piggies on top.)

By the end of April, I intend to be running 12 mile long runs.  I am not afraid or overwhelmed at the idea.  I know I can do it and I will.

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